No, I'm not talking about Hurricane Irene nor the 5.8 earthquake that hit DC--I'm talking about the entire break down of the English language that the Oxford English Dictionary is partaking in.
I love words (clearly because I'm an avid reader and compulsive writer). So it was with horror--I mean, H.O.R.R.O.R.--that I read an article about what was being added/subtracted from the Oxford English Dictionary. And before I tell you this list, let me tell you that I'm not that old.
So the editors of the dictionary have decided that "cassette tape" no longer qualifies being mentioned in the dictionary. This is outrageous to me on so many levels. When I bought my car 6 1/2 years ago, I insisted that it had a CD player AND a cassette player (what can I say, I'm too cheap to upgrade my Paula Abdul and Wilson Phillips). But just because I haven't upgraded, doesn't mean I don't still want to hear "Rush, Rush" or "Hold On" from time to time.
This deletion wouldn't have me so up in arms if there weren't absurd things being added. I personally think you can add terms without deleting others. I'd rather have a dictionary that fills an entire library than have my descendants think their ancestors were vapid idiots. But aapparently these secret hipster editors are adding text talk: LOL, OMG, and <3. I'm sorry, but is this a joke? Two of those are abbreviations, and one is just a symbol! What warrants them being present in a dictionary? To further complicate the moronic values of these editors they've also included: sexting, mankini and jeggings. REALLY?!?
These additions are proof that the world is being taken over by pop culture and trash TV. I will fully admit I indulge in both to some degree, but I'm intelligent enough to know that the Jersey Shore broads getting colored contacts is not news. For any people who believe aliens exist in the universe, and wonder why they haven't made contact--just look at the cable line up, the "newspaper," and now the DICTIONARY! I wouldn't want to meet us either...
So, I turned 30 today. I can't help but wonder if I've really learned enough about life to qualify for this age. But decided I'd make a list and see if I can get the club card:
30. Artsy movies were much more fun when I was a young, pretentious film student. Now, while often beautiful they manage to make my depression meter dip beyond the deepest blue.
29. Pretending to like rap music or the NBA just because a guy thinks they're cool wins you no points. Nor does this game of make-believe make NBA players have the same heart they did while playing in college (assuming they went to college or ever had heart).
28. The mom that you clang to as a child, were annoyed by as a teenager, becomes your best friend as an adult if you're lucky. So, girls beware your actions if you're still in the awkward, heated teen years.
27. Once you have a real job in the real world, waking up early isn't a rarity--it's a routine.
26. Speaking of the real world, the old wives tale of attracting more bees with honey than vinegar is 100% true. If you treat everyone with respect, you're less likely to have to worry that someone won't come through for you or who could potentially spit in your food.
25. Just because you like something, doesn't mean it's "good;" it's just your taste, not necessarily everyone else's.
24. Constructive criticism isn't to hurt your feelings. It's given to make you better at whatever you are trying to accomplish...
23. On the other hand, insults should be dealt with respectively and effectively. If someone tells you that you're unworthy or a piece of work, please remind them that pieces of work are worth quite a bit of money all of the world.
22. And speaking of worthiness, the wisest quote ever said is, "No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." ~Eleanor Roosevelt. In other words, don't give entrance to your soul to any one unless they've earned it and damn well deserve the ticket.
21. Your family can/will be all these things: loving, annoying, encouraging, embarrassing, frustrating, heartbreaking.
20. Also at the end of the day, you only get to choose your husband--not the rest of your family. You are either born in or get birthed in--so practice acceptance.
19. Not to sound like a self-help author, but until you know who you are, don't bother falling in love. You will be wasting every one's time, including your own.
18. Once you are in love don't confuse it with happiness--everyone has bad days. If you're happy 85-90% of the time you're ahead of the game.
17. Always work hard and try your best...
16. But remember just because you work hard, doesn't mean you get recognition. Just know that you've done the ultimate job you could, and rejoice in that--because your choir inside is the only one singing (sorry but it's true 99.9% of the time).
15. This one is common, but very true: You can't please all the people all the time... So, you should settle with pleasing yourself and try to please those you love.
14. The best definition of integrity is to own your successes and mistakes. Blaming someone else does nothing but make you look worse to those around you.
13. Always say "hello" with a sincere smile; you never know who's day you may make a difference in.
12. Don't hate anyone, it drains your energy. Although I fully support strongly disliking people.
11. This one breaks my heart, but vampires are NOT real. But that doesn't mean that authors should take liberties with old folklore and make them sparkle.
10. Some of your best friends hide who they are until a special moment or a crisis. Once they reveal themselves, hold on to them...
9. Also, make sure that you return the favor. Be the best friend you can be at all times--this includes pointing out food in teeth, saying "I love you" when appropriate, and driving to ER's at all hours (to name a few).
8. Speaking of saying "I love you," say it as often as possible to those you love you actually love. Life is short and you never want them to wonder if it's true or regret that you missed your chance to say so.
7. Letting go of bad things in your past doesn't mean forgetting. It means using that experience to become a better person without letting it rule you by fear or anger.
6. Daddy's Little Girls grow up to be bigger Daddy's Little Girls. We just learn to wear make-up while watching baseball, basketball and football.
5. The designated hitter is still an AWFUL idea!
4. Home isn't where you hang your hat, but who holds your heart.
3. Speaking of your heart, don't protect it too much. Let it get broken. Then revel when you find your best friend who protects with it his life for you! (I love you, Brian!)
2. Jeans and a cute top can make you feel just as sexy as a ball gown; and it takes a lot less effort/dieting/primping.
1. Lastly, age truly means nothing. Don't lose your spirit to goof off and have the time of your life every chance you get--from 5 years old to 100!
I would like to confess, right here and now, that I'm a nerd (which can probably be deduced from my previous posts anyway), and I'm VERY proud of this fact. But it leads me to a very important (and slightly irritating to me) question: When did being a nerd became popular?
Comic-Con in San Diego is this weekend. I have yet to go...but in the past there was always tickets available leading about two weeks up and sometimes even the day of. Not this year. Comic Con has been completely sold out for at least a month. I started checking at the end of May for presenters/panels and booths. At the time the passes were already sold out, and no one I would eagerly want to see had announced their presence.
However, about two weeks ago (maybe a little longer) many of my favs announced they would in fact be in attendance. And, of course, I say to you again Comic-Con is completely sold out! Ugh!
Maybe I'm too frugal, but I just can't see dropping a couple hundred dollars with no guarantee that anything/one I want to see will be there. I just can't do it, captain.This is mainly because I know my luck--if I drop the dough before I see a panel I want to see announced, no announcement will ever come. I'm not saying that I can't find other panels and such to occupy my time; but if I'm going to drop money, I want it to at least be for something semi-specific.
But thanks to the currently trendy world of sci-fi/fantasy/horror/ and all things previously thought uncool (and my cheap ass), I will miss a screening of Jane Espenson's first episode of Torchwood accompanied by the cast (Hello, Captain Jack Harkness! er, I mean John Barrowman)! I will also miss Matt Smith and Karen Gillian at a Doctor Who presentation. Also Laurell K. Hamilton will have a booth...And this is where I kick myself for being said "cheap ass."
Although if anyone has access and wants to offer up an A-W-E-S-O-M-E(!) birthday present--the Torchwood screening would be a preference.
I'm roughly a week away from a "milestone" birthday, and I hate to admit it but I'm ambivalent on it's meaning. I'm grateful to be alive, more in love with my husband everyday, I have a family that always supports, a wonderful career, friends who make me laugh and accept me; so I'm not really sure where this birthday is supposed to leave (or start) me.
I love being the center of attention, so my birthday is a day I look forward to (the day, not the week--that's another post for another time). But this year turning the BIG 3-0, I have absolutely no clue how I want to spend/celebrate it. This could be for a number of reasons, but nevertheless it's not very like me. When I turned 21, a fairly large group went to the beach after my best friend threw me a blowout. 21 I understood, I could legally buy alcohol and was given a license to party. But 30? I'm afraid I'm kinda clueless.
Part of the reason could be that I know a celebration on the day is highly unlikely. The day falls on a Tuesday this year, and it just so happens my hubby teaches on Tuesday nights. So there is no way we'll have a birthday dinner at 11 PM , although there will probably be cake (I know at 30 I should know better, but whatever--you only live once!).
But I think the largest reason I'm ambivalent is that I'm completely content. There is nothing I feel that I want or even need. Don't get me wrong, we all want things--cruises, houses, dresses, babies, bathing suits, Comic Con tickets; but while I may want some of these things, I'm not jumping out of my skin having to have them.
E-v-e-r-y-o-n-e keeps asking what I'm doing for my birthday, and I've been giving a classic shrug or a quiet "I'm not sure." My dear, loving husband is beyond frustrated (I think) with me saying "I don't know." I'm afraid that I've become boring in my young age: I have NO desire to party until the sun comes up, I have absolutely NO urge to drink more than 6 beers, and under NO circumstances do I want to go to a club (which isn't something I looked forward to at 21 either).
I'm not saying I wouldn't enjoy going to a casino, karaoke dive bar, or something random that includes my amazing husband, amusing friends and seafood. But I can't seem to make a decision or even narrow down to a few decisions. I'm open for suggestions as long as I can stay in a tank top, jeans and flip flops...
The Emmy nominations were announced today--and no, I did not wake up at 5:30 AM to watch; I checked once I woke up at a suitable hour (I am NOT a television addict). Truthfully, the one person that I immensely wanted nominated I wasn't worried about. I thought, " Katey Sagal won the freaking Golden Globe! No way is the academy going to miss her!"
I truly thought that Kurt Sutter (Sagal's husband and series creator of Sons of Anarchy) was being his usual dark and pessimistic self and paid no mind when he tweeted SOA would receive no nominations. Turns out Sutter was right, and I really didn't see it coming.
If you haven't watched Sons of Anarchy--you're a fool. My husband (the die hard Shield fan) tuned in before I did, but it didn't take me long; especially because I also love Sutter's work. The show is brilliantly written by Sutter and his staff. Granted because it's Sutter it's dark, depressing at times, dirty, bloody, some WTF moments (I mean, almost boinking your sister?!), but at the end of the day it's honest.
It's very rare that a show and an actress portray a rape survivor with such realism and heart. Sagal as Gemma embodies so much of what makes women powerful, vulnerable and calculating. Sutter and Sagal are so fantastic that at times, because of my experiences, the show can be hard to watch. But to not recognize an actress just because you may not want to discuss/like the experiences of the character is bull sh*t.
The reality is the nominations, in large part, are politics. For this reason, I salute Sutter. He, most likely, will never receive a nom because he isn't in this business for the politics; he wants to create art and tell stories. It's tragic that an award for television acting isn't based on the talent but on politics. Katey Sagal steals every scene she's in (sorry, Charlie) and you can't help but feel her emotions through your television. I have cheered her on, bawled my eyes out, thought "oh sh*t," been troubled by some of her decisions, and moved by her vulnerability.
There is no other show on any network that tells darker tales and yet still inspires a close knit family. That's right--family. Yes, SOA is about a biker gang; and yes, the premise was influenced by Hamlet (still praying Sutter doesn't kill everyone). But the base line and heartbeat of the show is family: Gemma and Jax, Jax and Abel, Clay and Jax, Gemma and Clay, Jax and Tara, and finally the large extended family of the Club. If you don't believe me, rent the first three seasons on DVD or Blu Ray (Season 3 will be released on August 30). Or if that's too much of a time commitment, tune into FX in September. As long as you don't expect rainbows and bunny rabbits, you won't be disappointed.
I won't say the Academy got all the nominations wrong; after all, Walton Goggins (the only reason I will probably see Cowboys vs Aliens)is finally recognized. But based on the screw up where nominations are concerned overall, I won't hold my breath (sadly) for him to win for fear of passing out.
I'm calling my own meeting of Soaps Anonymous. I don't watch a ton of soap operas; to be honest I only watch General Hospital. My reasons my surprise some, especially because some of the stories lines as of late haven't been my cup of tea. But let me tell you how my loyalty started.
One summer during my middle school years I stumbled upon this beginning and staple of daytime television. At the time Robin Scorpio (now Drake--played by Kimberly McCullough) was a teenager, and she was madly in love with Stone. I was drawn in because not long before this I found out that a family friend on contracted AIDS while on her job as a nurse. During this time AIDS wasn't as widely talked about and there really wasn't that much information about it, but GH was telling Stone's story and his journey with AIDS. They were one of the only shows--daytime, primetime, whatever, that actually opened a dialogue and I had so many questions that I went through the learning with Robin. Not only that, the emotional end was true and realistic that it was brilliant.
Robin & Stone
Then as I entered high school a new group of talent took center stage and they were my age. Elizabeth (Rebecca Herbst), Emily (Amber Tamblyn), Nikolas (Christopher Tyler) and the one consistent from my first watching Lucky (Jonathan Jackson). These four characters were beyond brilliantly written. Granted Nikolas' backstory, a prince with a very gothic background, was/is a little far fetched, but the dynamics of the group couldn't have been more grounded. With this group of four GH took on another (unfortunately still) widely undiscussed issue for at least it's second time--rape. This story line and Elizabeth and Lucky are the reason I keep tuning in 15 years later. They ARE my Luke and Laura.
Elizabeth & Lucky, the early years.
Then the writer's added Carly (originally Sarah Brown, now Laura Wright) and the viewers couldn't have asked for a better villain turned champion. Through the years GH has added other characters who warm my heart--Sam (Kelly Monaco), grown up Maxie (Kristin Storms), grown up Lulu (Julie Berman), Dante (Dominic Zamprogna), Patrick (Jason Thompson), Jax (Ingo Rademacher) and please don't forget Alexis (Nancy Grahn).
But all the fans are worried about GH's future with so many other soaps are getting canned. Television viewing has changed in so many ways just in the last few years that ratings aren't completely accurate until two weeks later so that the DVR viewings are factored. Unfortunately for a show that airs every day, people only look at the immediate results.
Clearly from my first paragraph I don't think the show is perfect; as a matter of fact I would say that the last 4-5 years the writing hasn't been it's best (with exception of the Domestic Violence storyline). During big months of the years the writers try to jump the shark (train crashes, serial killers, oh my), and have forgotten what brought them viewers in the first place: their social commentary, realistic emotions, and the ability that even the farthest fetched idea is grounded in a raw, common human trait.
There are a couple things that I hope the new writing regime accomplish: 1. Please get rid of Siobhan McKenna. No offense to Erin Chambers, I'm sure she's lovely. But the Irish accent is awful and I truly hate her with Jonathan Jackson (and in Port Charles in general unless she goes mute). 2. While I love Vanessa Marcil, Brenda's return is driving me batty. I don't like anyone blindly hating Carly. Robin and Carly spent years cultivating their dislike. Brenda has become like a dog with two bones--Sonny and Jax. I'll be honest, the way she's been written makes me fast-forward through those scenes. 3. PLEASE make Spinelli go back to his original incoherent babble.
But if the worst happens, and GH is added to the chopping block. The Spencer clan will be my most missed, followed closely by the Quartermaines. For me this families include the estranged, Carly and Jason, rarely scene now Monica and Bobbie. My best advice to the new writer's to keep that from happening: you have the talent, give them something amazing to do. Luke's Intervention, Carly's love for Michael, Nikolas and Lucky saying goodbye--all of these a recent great examples. Lucky finding Elizabeth after she was raped, Emily grieving her mother, Carly coping with post partum are some from longer ago. Please do amazing work so that loyal fans don't get annoyed and irritated and start turning the channel (or chose not to record) too! (Although as long as Jonathan Jackson and Rebecca Herbst stay, so will I).
A month ago she told me there was no crying--I only broke this rule once in front of her. A week ago she told me to act like she wasn't leaving...so I ignored the elephant in the room. Two days ago she said it wasn't a goodbye, but a see you soon. And then yesterday came and her desk was empty.
A very special person is on a road trip right now. The sad part is that this road trip is not a round trip. Ingy's on her way to the next big step in her life...in Chicago. The Windy City is beyond lucky to have such a witty, beautiful, and wonderful gal; and LA is missing a piece of itself and feeling empty right now (especially in the office).
Ingrid has helped to keep me sane over the last few years and I, honestly, (even though it's already a reality) can't imagine not having her across from me. To help with this ode to Ingrid, I had a couple of people give me their thoughts on the matter:
"Ingrid Alberts is a strange and lovely combination of West Coast bombshell and Midwest tomboy… When I think Ingrid, I think: football and Louboutins, dive bars and J Brands, ponytails that can be blown out into the best hair in the business. Ingrid is a selfless and loyal friend. She is one of the most genuine people I’ve had the pleasure of knowing and I miss her already." ~Anne
"I am oh so going to miss being able to save your day at the drop of a dime! And yes, I will not forget you are just a phone call or an email away! I am excited for all that is to come in your life! Thank you for sharing the 10-10-10; it is my go to for sure! XX" ~Jess
"You’re not even half way through your travels to Chicago and we’re all missing you so very much! For the past 6 Seasons, I have looked up to see your light shining bright (not only your desk light but your big smile that lights up the room). What are we going to do without you? Poor Polly…she is moping around already….I know you will stay in touch by Facebook, but you know you can always call me for anything! We have no doubts that you will be a shining star! Love you!" ~Wendy
Ingy, for me, you've been solid ground on days that seem to spin with no slowing down; the biggest cheerleader for even the smallest positive things; the most hysterical comments that can make me crack a smile like no one else.
I'm not sure how I will function without the sametime commentary on noises. Or who else will convince me about beauty tricks that at first sound filthy? (I think my longest was 4 days; you were 8, I think. I've still got some learning to do.) College football season in this office may have just dried up, but when I watch the Badgers I pull for them because of you.
To say that I'm going to miss you, my friend, is to put it mildly. I know that we will have texts, phone calls, gchats, etc (we have a very important date on Monday, September 26th). But I eagerly await your November visit already! I know that you are going to do magnificent things wherever you are! Wishing you all the best and bitterly (and selfishly) wishing you didn't have to go. XXXOOO
PS-I promised no crying before you left, but you're on the road now--it's fair game.
I tend not to talk politics because, for starters, it depends on the issue not the party for me. My parents always taught me to vote for what I believed in, which meant I could care less if a candidate is republican, democrat, independent, green, polka dot, whatever. And technically this post isn't really about politics, but it is about a politician's family.
During the last election there were tons of issues that got under my skin, but nothing will make a person lose all credibility and respect from me quicker than not protecting rape survivors. Alas, it brings me to the first Palin offender: Sarah Palin herself. I was mortified and outraged that to save money on the Alaska budget as Governor she, at the very least, allowed survivors to pay for the processing of their own rape kits.
Yes, I'm aware that she claims ignorance of this claim despite the fact that she also claims to have gone through the budgets of different towns/cities line by line. Palin is one of, what I consider, still a small group of women in politics. In my opinion she should be a leader for women and protect them and their rights to the umpteenth degree, and ignorance is not a valid excuse for falling short.
Based on Bristol Palin's recent book, she also doesn't set an accurate or good example at home either. I will admit right now that I have not read the book, and truthfully do not intend to because this family doesn't deserve my money in their pockets. However, the last several days (almost a week) the news circuit has been flooded with Bristol and her account of "losing" her virginity.
She tells a story of getting drunk on wine coolers to the point of not remembering the night, and says that Levi stole her virginity. Then she goes on national television saying, "I never said it was date rape." UGH! (Pulling my hair out, throwing things and wanting to seriously forget that the Palins ever quit staring at Russia!)
The quote that truly sends me over the edge is the one on Good Morning America today:
"I'm not accusing Levi of date rape, or rape at all, but I am just looking back with the adult eyes that I have now and just thinking that was a foolish decision," Bristol says. "I should have never been underage drinking and I should have never gotten myself into a situation like that."
Could this sound more like a survivor (or more rather a victim that still hasn't coped)? What survivor hasn't blamed theirself at first? This reaction to an assault tells victims that they should blame themselves. It's beyond tragic that a young woman that is so well known and can get air time on television is spewing this vomitous rhetoric from her mouth. This type of rationalization is what advocates, supporters, survivors, and some law makers have tried to change for decades.
I sincerely hope that any survivor takes her words with the grain of salt they should be. And for any girl who thinks it's okay to have their virginity "stolen" on a drunken night they don't remember, I pity you. Below is an appropriate definition for a drug facilitated sexual assault:
"When drugs or alcohol are used to compromise an individuals ability to consent to sexual activity. In addition, drugs and alcohol are often used in order to minimize the resistance and memory of the victim of a sexual assault."
I highly doubt Bristol will read this, but if one survivor does and realizes the sexual assault they experienced was NOT their fault regardless of underage drinking, drugging or being somewhere they weren't supposed to be then this post will have made all the difference. But on the off chance Bristol does read it: Please, please, please quit flinging your ignorance like a poo slinging monkey around when rape survivors are already not respected and protected. Also, pay careful attention to the definition above.
I finally read all three books of what is referred to has the Millennium Trilogy, although most people I know refer to it as The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo Trilogy. I have to be honest--I don't get it, and you should consider me NOT on the bandwagon. I am certain several thousands of people disagree...BUT:
The books are enjoyable, sort of. The first one is enjoyable about 300 pages in, the second about 200 pages and the third from the beginning. To me, especially with the first book, it took 300 pages for the story to finally start. The first part is ALL setup. Maybe I've officially become a part of the ADD generation, but that's excessive, unnecessary exposition. But I was also the same kid who read Charles Dickens for fun, so I find it hard to believe that it was ADD kicking in at almost 30 years of age.
Please understand, I'm not talking ill of the dead. Stieg Larsson clearly had a brilliant mind that was very creative; however, parts of his books almost read like he's giving a history report. I, by no means, am saying that Swedish history and scandal are not important and enthralling--but for a novel I don't need to know every nook and cranny. There's also the curious part of me that thinks fiction shouldn't have footnotes: You should intrigue your audience enough to make them research and learn on their own.
Another reason that it dragged for me is that I really just don't care for third person narrative at this point in my reading career. Because at the end of the day, I want to be in a character's head. I want to know their emotions, motivations and their fears. It plugs the reader (at least for me) deeper into the story and adds a connection that third person never truly accomplishes.
Also (and I may just be too sensitive to this issue) the sex in the book seems skewed. Sex scenes in a book that move the plot do not offend me, so the scene(s) in this trilogy didn't offend me. What does somewhat irritated me is that the only scene that actually details and describes the sex is a rape scene. There are other scenes where sex is alluded to but the narrative cuts off right as "so and so" land in bed, even though it is made clear more times that I can count in the books that both main characters enjoy sex. I realize that the rape scene is highly important to the overall story but I think this decision misrepresents Lisbeth's over all view of sex.
I will admit it took me far longer to finish The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo than it should have (I'm talking months here). I made it through the last two books much quicker for a few reasons: 1. My work schedule is currently not insane; 2. The action in the books was kicked into high gear; and 3. I vowed to myself that I'd finish the series.
While the books are intriguing and the main character Lisbeth Salander is spellbinding and disturbing, I can only recommend these books for an consistent readers. If you only read occasionally or don't truly enjoy reading, I don't think this is the book for you. Any other words: Only avid readers need apply.
In August 2003, I made the move out West from my home state of South Carolina. This move fulfilled a self-proclaimed prophecy I made at 5 years old. Granted my 5 year old self wanted to sing and act; a goal that drastically changed before I graduated high school. I distinctly remember at the time that I just wanted to get away from my sleepy town and stifling state (all the while knowing it was beautifully green and friendly).
At 22 years of age my eyes were huge with wonder and my stomach was filled with excitement and anticipation. I thought to myself multiple times during the drive out west, "I'm finally getting out." I had no idea that I would be horribly homesick my first semester and that I would without a doubt miss the South and the opportunities it didn't hold for a life in television.
The longer I've stayed out West, the prouder I've become of my state. Yes, I know that many people judge the South, and I'm not saying mistakes have never been made in my home state. But at the end of the day, my comfort foods, sounds and activities come directly from the very place I couldn't wait to leave.
So, this morning I was deeply amused when I heard the statement: "I thought once people left the South they left the grits behind." It made me wonder what else I've refused to part with...
Grits (obviously). I don't have the selection out in La La land that South Cackalacki offered, but at least I can find some. Although typically I can only find Quaker Oats' Instant Grits, which is truthfully perfect because my husband doesn't particularly like grits.
Boiled Peanuts. My mom has to ship me raw green peanuts from back home (actually from Cayce Farmer's Market to be exact) in order to make them the right way. I have yet to find a steady place in Los Angeles to buy green peanuts when they are in season. Occasionally I can find raw peanuts, but they are always the size of goober peas--which means they are never as good.
Country Music. This drives my husband crazy, but I will love country music until the day I die. LA only has one wide reaching station, and my radio reflects that accordingly. (I typically only flip between Go Country 105 and my iPod; I, honestly, don't even know what other stations are in LA! Ha!)
Red Velvet Cake. Yes, I know it's all the rage everywhere now. But as a little girl I was only able to have red velvet around Christmas, and it was always from scratch. My grandmother (Ed Nanny is what we call her) use to think it was hilarious to watch 5-foot-nothing Polly fight against her Uncle Al (who's over a foot taller, and intimidating if you don't know him) for the most pieces of her homemade red velvet cake.
Tailgating. I know other places in the country claim to tailgate, but I hate to tell you: you haven't tailgated until you've done so for a Carolina football game (or even my little Newberry football games). Nothing beats waking up exceptionally early and drinking mimosa's for a few hours, then ice cold beer and grilling.
BBQ (shredded pork, not just cooking on the grill). If the BBQ sauce is red, it's not the right color: It should be yellow. Back home or BBQ sauce is made with mustard and vinegar and it's sent from heaven. I loved Saturdays where my dad picked up Hites BBQ (a whole in the wall where you only pick up your food). Once home, I'd fix a hash (if you don't know what it is, just eat it--don't ask) sandwich and pour that mustardy-vingeary goodness on it. (My mom occassionaly ships me BBQ sauce along with my peanuts.)
A picture of my favorite BBQ joint back home.
"Y'all." I know that it's not grammatically correct, but this will never leave my vocabulary. It's a homey sound that soothes the soul.
So, while I now accept the fact that I am a Los Angeleno, a part of my heart will always be in South Carolina. And no amount of time in Cali will change the fact that I am a Carolina Girl!
I love sports--this is a shock to no one. But there are two times of the year where I can barely have a conversation without being distracted by the television: College Basketball's March Madness and the College World Series. Both of these distractions become far more exasperated if any of the following teams are involved: Gonzaga Bulldogs, (South*) Carolina Gamecocks, Notre Dame and Clemson.
This weekend my baby brother and his girlfriend game to visit. We went out to eat on Sunday, and I, of course, made sure the waiter turned the nearest television to ESPN2 so that I could watch Coach Tanner and the Gamecocks. I contributed to conversation for the most part while constantly looking at the television. This only got worse when we got back to my place.
My mom called around the top of the 9th--I feigned conversation, and then bluntly told my mom, "Gotta go. It's the bottom of the 9th and the Cocks are batting." (I think I did mumble an "I love you" before I hung up.) Then my husband tried to tell me a story when Robert Beary hit a double and I screamed at the TV. At that point everyone in the room realized, don't talk to Polly until the game is over. The end of the game didn't take too long, but with a tied score of 4 to 4, the anticipation always seems to drag it out. After the bases were loaded, Scott Wingo hit in the winning run. And the Gamecocks won their first game in Omaha; something they didn't even do when they won the Series last year.
It was awesome! But, I think the most hilarious moment of the evening was listening to Wingo's post-game interview. It reminded me of the scene in Bull Durham when Crash Davis is telling Ebby Calvin LaLoosh the appropriate wording and phrases to say in an interview; and it was painfully obvious that no such lecture was given to Wingo. He said the word "battle" as a verb at least 7 times in an interview that totalled at most one minute and 45 seconds.
Crash Davis from Bull Durham.
Don't get me wrong Scott Wingo is young, and he will have plenty of time to learn. Being a (not really) new Los Angeleno, I look forward to seeing him play for the Dodgers. And just in case he doesn't have is own Crash Davis, here's a sample of a well-rehearsed speech: * The asterisk is for anyone who may not have been sure which team I was referring to if I had just said "Carolina." But for future reference, if Pondering Polly says "Carolina" or "USC," it means the University of South Carolina.
"I'm just happy to be here, and I hope I can help the ball club. I just want to give it my best shot, and the good Lord willing things will work out. You got to play 'em one day at a time. A good friend of mine use to say, 'This is a simple game. You throw the ball, you catch the ball, you hit the ball. Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose. And sometimes it rains.'"
When I'm not watching sci-fi or supernatural shows, I'm probably watching a procedural of some sort. And typically (I would say 9 times out of 10) that procedural probably has a strong female lead. A couple months ago I heard that Ally Walker was going to get her own show on Lifetime--a procedural (whether they want to admit it or not) with a nice balance of personal drama. I was ecstatic to hear about the show, I've missed Ally has a true lead since Profiler (one of my favorite shows of all time).
But something hit me last night while I watched the show, and it wasn't a new revelation but it seemed to come into focus: A woman cop main character--she's a b*tch. If the main character isn't rip, roaring with a b*tch-a-tude; she's at the very least difficult. This seems to be the tried and true method for making a strong woman character, especially if she is to portray a police officer.
Don't get me wrong, I--at times--proudly take the title b*tch with me. But why? Why is it that if a woman has an opinion and is (more than likely) right, she has to be difficult or a b*tch? Why isn't she seen as strong, admirable or confident?
Watching The Protector made this common (and if I do say so myself) lazy ploy come into a painfully, razor sharp focus. Unfortunately, it's not the first time this has been done, and I doubt it will be the last time. But to give you a few more examples, here are some strong female police characters I love who happen to be b*tches:
Gloria Sheppard from The Protector. Ally Walker was fantastic, as usual. But the writers made Sheppard smart, tough, endearing with a manipulative twist and a b*tch. At least 3 different characters asked Sheppard if she "was going to make someone cry;" and one of those times, the words came out of her own mouth. Writers, you can make a character smug, sarcastic and a badass without beating us over the head that she's a raging b*tch.
Grace Hanadarko from Saving Grace. My husband hates this show, but to me Holly Hunter got to play one of the most interesting characters on TV. That being said, she was a different type of b*tch. She has no problem hitting, kicking, shooting, drinking, fornicating. They tried to balance all of her character's flaws/vices with her undying devotion to those closest to her, especially her nephew. But at the end of the day, she got labelled a "slutty bitch" because with all of her flaws and vices she broke up her partner's marriage by sleeping with him.
Brenda Leigh Johnson from The Closer. Kyra Sedgwick doesn't play Johnson as an overtly b*tchy female. Oh no, these writers were clever enough to mask it with a southern accent and charming sayings; which means, simply put, they gave the rest of the world all of our Southern Belle secrets. I assure you, if you hear a woman with a slight or gigantic twang say, "bless your heart," she doesn't think highly of you.
Mary Shannon from In Plain Sight. Mary McCormack is hysterical. But at the bare bones her character sums it up well with "I don't play well with others." Yet again very strong woman, but they paint her too strong. She avoids family, is more cynical than anyone on television, and always assumes the worst. Mary is inflexible almost to an unbreakable fault, but she has compassion under her stony exterior.
In case you can't tell, I do still love these characters. I just wish television writers would learn to write a strong, sarcastic character without branding them a b*tch. You can still have that character liked by more than just their inner circle--it won't hurt their street cred, honest.
In case it isn't blatantly obvious, I see a lot of movies. But I have gotten to the point that I don't go to certain theaters or to certain showtimes. The reason is because by the time the movie is over I feel like I've wasted my time and money because inevitably someone ruins the experience.
I am a complete suspension of disbelief person and I want to get lost in a movie, but because people lack social etiquette it doesn't always happen. For example:
1. I will (most likely) NEVER go to a midnight movie again. There are always large groups of teenagers so loud, I want to scream at them! If I'm a big enough fan of a film, franchise, actor to have my almost 30 year old ass at a theater in the middle of the night I WANT to be able to watch the movie in peace! So, please shut the hell up.
2. Cell phones attached to a person's fingers. It's a movie theater, which means it's dark. I don't want to see little flashes of light unless it's the usher making sure people are behaving. People who can't put their phones in a pocket or purse should have their fingers super glued to the keys. Or at the very least be kicked out and made fun of like the woman at the Alamo Drafthouse.
3. Then there's another breed of cell phone users in the theater--those who actually TALK on their phones. In no way or place is this EVER appropriate, E.V.E.R! I don't want to hear about your dog, your mom's decorations, or your friend's STD... Seriously, I enjoy a sound mix--so even if actors aren't talking on screen, you're still ruining the flick.
4. Another etiquette (common sense) issue is children in theaters. Let me say here: I like kids; I want to be a mommy. However, certain ages of children are not appropriate at some films. For instance, if your child can only talk in terms of "poopoo" and "peepee," please--for the sake Pete--don't take them to a R rated movie that includes zombies being hacked up, kinky sex, and/or any four letter word that adults use to express anger, disbelief, or excitement.
5. And lastly, be on time; better yet, make it for the previews. If being late can't be helped, find an outside seat. 15 minutes into a movie, when I actually feel connected, I don't want you bumping my legs whispering a yelling, "excuse me." There's also a very easy solution to this problem: movie theaters typically screen the same films every 2 1/2 hours--wait until the next one!
I'm sure there are countless other things that get on my (and everyone else's) nerves. As a matter of fact I have one more: I'm in the industry, I want to watch the credits. A person jabbering behind me means I have a hard time reading. It's still dark, be quiet.
See? There are so many ill-behaved people at movie theaters in today's age it's easy to list them out. I blame cell phones and poor parenting.
In case you were curious, this post was prompted by:
So, Rihanna has a new video ("Man Down"), which means there's a media firestorm. It's an amazing look at what every survivor feels at one point in their recovery--the desire for vengeance. But, of course, over concerned parents are bashing it. Parents Television Council, Industry Ears and the Enough Is Enough Campaign are all asking for the video to be banned from airing.
In the video Rihanna kills the man who sexually assaulted her the previous night. Rihanna, having experienced abuse before (whether sexual or not), hasn't killed anyone in real life. Instead this video in my opinion, and from what I can tell Rihanna's, is about a very real emotion that all survivors experience. I call it vengeance, but that's not really it. It's the desire to get back an innocence and power that was once yours. No, you don't have to kill the rapist to do that; but it's certainly a thought survivors have--or at least I know I have.
I, in no way, am condoning murder. It's something that I don't think I could ever be capable of, but it doesn't mean that I haven't wanted to lash out. I understand parents wanting to protect your children. But by not talking about sexual assault parents aren't protecting their kids; parents are just making their kids unprepared (and possibly more susceptible) for the future. The reality is that 1 out of 6 American women will be raped in their lifetime, which means these parents who don't want to talk about the issue probably know at least one survivor.
The other thing that is incredibly startling about this current outrage is a song released almost 20 years ago: Tori Amos "Me and a Gun." In the song, Amos discusses a night where she was violently raped. She talks about the thoughts that ran through her head--places she'd been or places she hadn't yet seen, the fact she sang hymns during the act to survive, and (in case you can't tell by the title) the knowledge that she was going to die. Luckily for all survivors out there, Amos (co-founder of RAINN) was able to survive because the attacker needed a drug fix. But I don't remember any outrage over this song, granted there was no video other than live performances. How can this be? A painfully vivid commentary where a victim (now a survivor) talks about her attack. Why didn't the parents get outraged at the violence towards a woman? I find it sickening and disturbing that the public is more in arms over the death of an assaulter than they ever were of even a potential death of a victim.
Both artists are giving a voice to a topic that still no one wants to talk about: this crime and assault against all human beings that has only been illegal in all it's current forms for not quite 40 years. Yet still it's the only crime where the victim catches as much heat if not more than the criminal (I mean take the NYC cops who were acquitted all because the victim wasn't "believable" enough).
Both artists give a raw, honest look inside what all survivors feel. The helplessness, tarnished, broken, angry, mutilated mind and soul that first surrounds the survivor before they learn to survive again. We should commend Rihanna for wanting to open this conversation up for young women and men. This video should be applauded for giving a voice to an ever silent epidemic. I, as a survivor, thank both artists for using their platforms to speak out for all of us.
A couple of weeks ago I did a post about the 10 women that I consider celeb heroes. When I made the list I didn't necessarily anticipate that I would actually get to meet any of them. But within days of the post, Golden Apple Comics announced an event that included my number 5--Jane Espenson. How could I miss that?
Once I committed to going, I had to wonder if I would lose part of my gumption. I mean, working in Hollywood I see actors off and on all the time. They don't scare me--I do not get star-struck. I will gladly say, "hello" and start a conversation. I once had an entire conversation with Brian Krause (the actor that convinced me boys weren't yucky in Return to the Blue Lagoon) without blinking an eye.
This fall, however, I learned that I get a different kind of struck. I get writer-struck. I was leaving work and walked right by Joss Whedon. I was on the phone with my mom and stopped speaking mid-sentence. I couldn't get a syllable out (I think my mom thought I dropped the phone). Once I found my motor skills again, I informed my mom of what just happened; she asked, "Did you say hi?" Ugh! No, Mom. Did you miss the radio silence?
So, last night I had the opportunity to meet Jane Espenson (an amazing television writer) and I spaced...Not entirely...I mean words came out, but completely in the wrong order. I told her she was one of my heroes because she is. She then asked if I was an aspiring writer, and I FROZE. My knee-jerk reaction for whatever reason was to tell her what I currently get paid to do, accompanied with the word "no."
Completely untrue! I most definitely am, even if you don't count the blog. Granted I don't want to be a television writer because my heart is in books; but still "no?" I have no idea what I was thinking. I think it was a combination of being writer-struck and the fact there was a line of people behind me. Being from the South, I often feel that I shouldn't take too much time if there are other people waiting.
But Jane was still gracious and kind and we talked daytime TV for a bit, even though I was dying to ask about Torchwood: Miracle Dayor Once Upon a Time. She even agreed to take a picture with me, and told me she was glad to meet me! Well, Jane, I assure you that I am the one who is completely over the moon to have been given a moment of your time!
Jane Espenson and me at Golden Apple Comics!
So, as of June 1st my number 5 is crossed off my list. Although I hope at sometime in the future I can pick her gorgeous brain without getting writer-struck.
There is a fantastic, brilliant rumor roaming the internet right now: David Tennant will be returning for the season finale of Doctor Who. Let me say right now: I HAVE NO IDEA WHETHER THE RUMOR IS TRUE OR NOT! IMDB reports that Tennant along with the fifth Doctor, Peter Davison, are appearing in this season's finale alongside the current Doctor, Matt Smith. In general, IMDB is quasi-reliable (at least for release dates); however, current show runner Steven Moffat is sneaky and sometimes too brilliant for his own good. Moffat hasn't tweeted Tennant's return which, honestly, doesn't hurt or help the rumor.
Regardless of whether the rumor is true or not, the idea of it got me thinking and remembering a mini-Doctor Who episode that had both Tennant and Davison. In the small (maybe five minute) episode "Time Crash", Tennant tells Davison, "You were MY Doctor." Of course, this made me want to make a list of my MY's "fill in the blanks."
David Tennant--You were MY Doctor. Yes, I enjoy the others and Smith is growing on me more and more each episode--but it still ends and begins with Tennant for me.
Lestat--You were MY vampire. I read, watch, and write way too many vampire books, shows, movies, and stories. But at the end of the day, my first fang love will always be Lestat. (For clarification, I mean the literary character, NOT Tom Cruise or Stuart Townsend.)
Vincent D'Onofrio--You were MY Thor. I enjoyed the new movie and Chris Hemsworth was very entertaining. However, Adventures in Babysitting is one of my all time feel good movies; and nothing beats Sara handing you the helmet and melting your heart.
Sarah Michelle Gellar--You were MY Buffy. Don't get me wrong I loved the movie for the brainchild it was, and doing a reboot without Joss is (and I quote) "are really stupid idea." When all is said and done, I want my world saving, asses kicked and clever quips said by SMG.
Michael Keaton--You were MY Batman. I know Christian Bale is doing a great job with the darker, re-envisioning; BUT who didn't LOVE Keaton as the man with great toys?
Christopher Reeve--You were MY Superman. (Wow, I am really showing my comic book geekiness!) I am a fan of all things Man of Steel, and Superman vs Batman is a common debate in my home. But when I read a Superman or Kal-El story, it's Christopher I will always picture.
Tim Curry--You were MY Frank-n-Furter. Frank is going to be another victim of a reboot. This reboot is especially annoying to me because is being headed by the dreaded Ryan Murphy; he might make Frank into an African-American, heterosexual woman...Oh wait! He already did that on Glee.
I'm sure there are countless others that could be added to this list, especially with the ever growing trend of reboots. If I made a list of all the rehashed characters, this blog would never end. So, I'll leave you with MY top picks.
Before I could speak, my dad would sing George Strait's "Baby Blue" to me and I would "Ooo" in tune with him (this is according to him--It was the early '80's so I don't think there's video to prove it). This story is a favorite of my parents to tell accompanied with the line, "she could sing before she could talk." I can't disprove any of this, especially since I don't remember a time in my life without a love affair for music--especially country music.
My love for music includes a wide variety, but chick country is always my comfort zone (insert my husband's eye roll here). Chick country (any song by a female artist in that genre) has been my favorite since my dad popped in a Pasty Cline cassette before I was old enough to work a tape player. As I got older, I fell in adoration of Reba, Martina, Faith (I have her first album Take Me as I Am on cassette, CD, and iTunes) and the like.
Chick country lends itself very accommodatingly to my voice and always has. I remember being bitter during voice recitals when I had to sing "Ave Maria" or some classical song that no one knows. I would always make my grandfather painfully sit through Star Search (that's a performance competition show that was BEFORE Idol; can you imagine?).
But by the time American Idol started I had readjusted my dream of once singing on the Grand Ole Opry stage to more realistic ventures--you know, television production. So, I didn't watch the first several seasons beyond the auditions because it was too bitter-sweet. Then during the 4th season auditions, I saw a girl belt out "Independence Day" by Martina McBride. I swore I would only watch as long as she was in the competition; turns out I watched the whole thing and Carrie Underwood accepted the title.
Carrie at the Opry. Pulled from newsok.com
Carrie Underwood is by far one of my favorite chick country artist now. I will watch any thing that has her appearing. I love her music and she happens to be a "sister" (this would be the first blog shout out for ΣΣΣ).
My Carrie support reared it's ugly head this week. After only watching the American Idol's auditions this season, I felt the need to tune into the two part finale. I'll admit, I only tuned in the first night because Carrie Underwood was picking one of Lauren song's, and I--incorrectly--thought there would be a tape piece that featured Carrie. So, I tuned into the big night with no one confirming who was performing beyond Lady Gaga. But I listened to my gut because I just knew Carrie would be there, and I was right! But as much as I love the girl, Scotty's duet with Tim McGraw was tons better than her and Lauren.
May is coming to a close, which also means that the major five networks television season is closing as well. The upfronts are done; everyone knows whether or not they are truly unemployed or just on hiatus. It also means that everyone is going out with a bang, a whimper or a weeping goodbye.
At the end of the each season, a viewer realizes there are three very clear types of season finales: 1. the "We are definitely coming back, squirm for 4 months with anticipation," 2. the "We're on a bubble--it could go either way; so here's a little tease with wrap up," and 3. the "We're out the door, but thanks for watching (if you were)."
A few examples:
1. "We're definitely coming back." Supernatural: The writers of Supernatural always go out with a bang--always. This year was no different really (although it wasn't an action bang this time). The last few years the writers have been toying around the idea of religion and God (despite mutliple impending apocalypses the supreme being was no where to be found). The finale this past Friday spun the idea into a raging tailspin that I can't wait to see the closure on.
Castle: Despite the writing feeling a little lackadaisical during May Sweeps, the team pulled together to do what they do best for the finale: a nail biting, gut wrenching, extravaganza cliff hanger. Granted, the person injured is a major player and will no doubt be returning; it still leaves the audience wondering how they will be saved. Also, you have Rick finally saying the "L" word, which is an entirely different type of cliffhanger; and will Kate even remember hearing that word?
2. "We're on a bubble." The Good Wife: I love the editing style of this show--the use of the Soprano-esque cut to black at infuriating spots. Although the finale didn't really do that this time; for me, it could have cut to black a good 45 seconds sooner to have the impact I wanted. But the viewers finally got to see Alicia and Will making a dash (with all signs pointing "no") to the bedroom. The tease here is what will this fall out be. Peter will now be in office, which means--inevitably--some paparazzi saw Alicia commit this act of indiscretion.
Nikita: This show has not gotten nearly enough press in my opinion. Maggie Q is great, and the finale matched her. The writers had a couple of fake deaths, some major ass kicking, a love story on track, and a twist. This was the perfect on the bubble finale. The major story arc of taking down a main villain was accomplished (Yay!). But the writers also included a short scene with fellow-protagonist Alex that setup a new bad guy, and--maybe, just maybe--mentor vs pupil season next year.
3. "We're out the door." There are actually two types of these. One where you've religiously let a program into your home for multiple seasons and it's time to conclude the story. The other is the one season wonder who is out for the count, and probably was starting in December.
Smallville: In an earlier post I talked about this being the final season of Smallville, which meant their finale was a weeping goodbye 2 hour drama. The writing for the episode was not great, but it included clips and cast members that made it worth it for die hard fans. Also, the episode accomplished 2 things (sort of) that ALL of it's viewers had been waiting for: 1. Clark finally flew and 2. Clark put on the suit. Well, these things kinda happened; there was no true shot of Clark in the suit, and all the flying was poor CGI where you couldn't distinguish if it was truly Tom Welling. I was still over joyed to see Michael Rosenbaum as Lex again; and I teared up every time John Schneider came on the screen.
No Ordinary Family: This was the little show who just couldn't. Despite having a stellar cast--Michael Chiklis, Julie Benz, Stephen Collins, Josh Stewart--it just could not get off the ground. ABC did them no favors with the schedule, putting it on against Glee, NCIS, Idol, etc (it bounced between 8 PM and 9 PM). The finale had all the drama and fighting that you want from a show with super heroes. The villain is defeated (Collins definitely wasn't a minister in this series). But just to show they had heart and faith (albeit misplaced) they gave audiences a tease that there could be more: the government knows about the abilities of the Powell family. And that is where ABC cut to black.
Now that the networks are entering the land of repeats and cheap reality, we turn to cable (namely USA, HBO, Showtime, and TNT) to entertain us. I, personally, am looking forward to Rizzoli and Isles the most; talk about a finale they left me squirming! July 11th will be almost NINE months I've been left wondering what happens to the Rizzoli family.
Overall this finale season was lackluster at best. There were a few others (Fringe, NCIS: LA) that went out with a true bang. But overall, I'm not really squirming for the fall. In fact, I feel relaxed waiting for what cable has to offer this summer.
